Monday, December 3, 2007

What I did last summer


Ok, I'll admit it. I did the MySpace thang. Deleted the whole thing back in August when I retreated to the 'Simple Life'. So today out of nothing more that sheer curiosity, I checked on a few of my "Top Friends" just to see what was new in their world. Well....

Baldy McMuppetbrows: Now I thought this person was cool when I was um...drunk. Turns out? Nope. Picks up big things to look cool, probably still drinks "man juice" (don't ask), and can't climb a fence. Still bald with Bert and Ernie's eyebrows. And a Steelers fan. Ick.

Superman: I have so many deep seeded issues with Superman. Not with the individual I am speaking of, but the superhero. And those adults obsessed with him. Well when I first met Superman I thought he was gay. He had a gaggle of fat chicks in distress that he would rescue at a moments notice, interviewed their wedding photographers, loved karaoke, and wore tight T-shirts. Turns out...not gay, just creepy.

Freaky Ass Scary Red-Head: Just did time in JAIL. Awesome. She's out now and in a bar near you.

The guy with little dogs: Um...there just isn't enough SPACE to get into this one. The mild mannered computer programmer dude with 2 little frou-frou dogs is probably the biggest serial killer of them all. Allegedly.

Looking back on all of that, it's nice to know that I have come a long way snce retreating to the Simple Life 5 months ago. Things are way better this way. I could be buying Xmas present for these people right now.

j.

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See, I think I am genius and should have my own 1-hour cable news show. For God's Sake GERALDO is on the air still. But since even Fox News isn't calling I'll just spew the commentary and the awesomeness here...